Nu ren,
My parents had an argument today. And it has been a long time since I last saw my mom cried. My dad has hurt her, physically. Although I did not witness what he did to my mom, but i know its a very painful experience.
A husband shouldn't hurt her wife, especially doing physical damage to her, or anyone for that matter. Some1 that is so close to you.
Growing up, seeing how my dad hurt my mom, seeing my mom crying to sleep, even for me being abused by my dad, I swore to not be like my father. I will not hurt another individual, especially my wife. I remember you ask me, will I hit my future wife? And I remember one time, you are confident last time saying I will not hit my future wife, because you know my character. I thank you for believing in me.
Growing up, I did not felt loved. I can't say that I didn't, not even a bit. Yes, I did felt love, from my Grandma, my mom, my dad, and my siblings. But its all very minimal. That is why, I said, I'll love my wife to the fullest, coz I want her to be happy, to be loved. I know the feeling of not being properly loved.
I do not know how to react to another person's kindness and love. I will ashamed to received that person's kindness towards me. Nu ren, you remember you asked to help me wash my face. I really do love it, for you to wash my face. But that time, I'll never forget and regret to reject you. From that day onwards, you never help me wash my face. Not because I do not like it, but no person has ever treat me so good, to help me wash my face. U understand? Not only that, sometimes you offer your food for me. I will not take it. Coz its your food. No one ever offered me food. I will not feel good to take other's food. If its your food, you eat it. Even though I have no food, I will not ask for food.
Nu ren, you understand? I love you. And you showed me that I too can experience loved. Although its minimal, but I thank you for loving me. I'll cherish it forever. The feeling of being loved.. Muacks muacks.... sob
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nan ren, i'm sorry to hear wat happened to ur family and to u. i have no rights to interfere ur family business and i do not intend to do so. nan ren, i care about u~ u are my bf n therefore u deserved my love. do not overthink my love for u, i'm treating u good caz i wan to... i won't feel hurt if u reject me, caz it's ok to be rejected, but i juz wanna treat u good.
i am loved by God n many people therefore i learn to love others, especially u. nan ren, i love you so much n treasure u 2!
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